Has Feeling Exhausted Become a Habit?
This last week I talked to several parents who are struggling with their time and feeling overwhelmed. The school year has started and some children are struggling to adjust. We have all been there. Phone calls, IEP meetings, and the stresses of life are starting to build up. Do you feel exhausted? There are days when I feel the same way!
How Do You View Boundaries?
Begin by looking at how you view setting boundaries. You may often think that giving yourself time and attention is a tradeoff that means less time is available to give to those that need you. Do you feel that setting boundaries is almost like building walls that keep others out in order to protect your time and life? This can create a huge inner conflict where you are torn between self-care and the responsibility you feel toward taking care of others.
How to Keep YOU in Your Life
Jenna Kutcher, Author described boundaries in a unique way that I think can benefit all of us. She said “Boundaries do not keep things, people, or opportunities out of your life, they keep you in YOUR life.” Start looking at boundaries almost as bumpers on a bowling alley. They are there to guard your time and your life not to build walls that keep people and other things out.
Setting the Right Boundaries:
One of the easiest things to do to keep YOU in your life is to learn to say “No.” I often have to sit down and rethink my life and schedule. Pathways is growing at an ever increasing rate. My problem is, I want do everything. Life is a well spring of opportunity and I want to live with my hands fully in all of them!
As a result, my life begins lacking clarity. Lately I have begun to prune down the things in my life that take up time but are not a part of the vision I have for my life. My boundaries are constantly changing in order to keep focused on what I do best and have the greatest passion for. Life is not about how busy you are, but how much of life you are actually living.
Feeling constantly overwhelmed, exhausted, and stressed is a warning sign not a medal of honor. Guard your time and well-being. Sit down frequently and reflect on how you feel about your life. Begin small by saying “No” to a few things and start setting smart boundaries that keep you in YOUR life!
Share below what things you have said “No” to that have kept YOU in your life!
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Authors
Melinda Jennis
Welcome! I am Melinda Jennis, like you I am a proud parent of children I adore and have a great vision for. My son has multiple disabilities and his path to success has been very difficult and cluttered with obstacles. He inspired me to start Pathways for Exceptional Children. One of my biggest passions for the last 20 years as a child advocate has been to train parents on how to help their children of all abilities be included and lead empowered and independent lives!
Dr. Michele Havens
Dr. Michele Havens received her Ed.D. degree from Rutgers University. She is certified in DIR/Floortime and is BCBA certified. She is a Professor Emeritus from Kean University and Montclair State University. Dr. Havens has provided training and services for parents and caregivers of children with disabilities from birth through adulthood for the last 40 years. She has also been a facilitator of several parent and sibling support groups.
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